shove on your hiking boots

Notes:


 I had an epiphany. I think a lot. I apply theory and frameworks of many things to everything. I ask lots of questions and I am creative. I love photography. Taking pics of the skies and clouds and sunsets.... Coolness!

I think I've decide that I want to be a trend forecaster. I think that is my niche; what I have been searching for. I always thought that I buy things and they end up being trendy in like a season or two. But I dont know if I quite want to be a designer. It might be fun but I'm on a different path now. 

I am from down south. I am going to a school up north. No amount of intercultural training, reading and studying the works or Gerte Hoffstede or Edward Hall can prepare for the experience of cultural differences. I learned more from that than I have from any class I have ever taken. I have thus decided that I should go on an ISEP exchange and study abroad. It's a great opportunity to broaden my mind even further. I like challenging myself, I get bored otherwise. 

Trend forecasting is like anthropology and keeping your eyes open as to what's happening all around you. My mind remembers random things. I think that it would be a great use of my overactive brain.

I live in Preston now. I am fine, getting on with it, y'know? I just am, but everyone else feels it, they feel the fact that they are miles from home and they can't see their families as often. It's a total change.

I don't feel like that. I moved, I didn't die. They are all still there if I wanna make the 5 hour car journey to go see 'em. I held Lotte as she sobbed before I left. She slept over and we went to Haynes the next day. She is coming up to stay for a few days in November, can't wait!

My week; I really should write this shit down, me'thinks.

Monday: Felt like crap. Thought sod it, took the antibiotics that gave me a rash last time and made me feel blah cause I didn't think it was possible to feel more blah. Took some inositol too. Slept, felt better and then met up with Sian and went to town.

Tuesday: Went to Liverpool. Class trip for Fashion and Brand Promo; collected a load of promo stuff, shopped loads and got soaked in the rain. Good times; Not! 15 minute walk home in the rain sucked. Wasn't really up to it or into it.

Wednesday: Woke up at 9, went back to bed tho and didn't surface again until 12. Was randomly checking Facebook and Rehearsals for drama society were decided in my absence as for 1. I was like what?!? Had to get dressed and get down there sharpish. I am a Priest in the Drama Society's production of Messiah. Stayed up 'til 4a.m doing coursework. Fun!

Thursday: Woke at 10, ready for class at 11. Exercise and Fitness practical session. Topic; Warm up, Static stretching is pointless apparently. Came back and printed off that assignment, made myself an MRP shake, dropped off my work. Got soaked, the rain never stops up here, came back and changed. Second rehearsal at 3. Came back and cooked pasta. 

Friday: Set my alarm for 8, crawled out of bed and 9.15. Recorded Physiology lecture coz brain went bye byes. He mentioned choline. I have some of that stuff so I had a chat afters. Gonna cover more stuff along those lines later and in semester two. Whoo hoo! Apparently inositol and choline are brill for me with the mtx. Good to know I'm on the right lines. Went to Asda on the bus, bought so much stuff I had to get a cab back. It cost f@*%ing £8! Ain't doing that again!

Basically, been here just over a month, pulling myself together right now. Let's see how it goes.

I have fresher's flu, so I'll be brief; I am alive, sorta, and I am at UCLAN!

I have no idea if everyone left for Insanejourna of if I should go twitter or something instead. I was thinking of starting one as an online portfolio for all the random quirky and brilliant stuff that is relevant for my course. I am too noncommittal to keep a hard copy portfolio, it seems to permanent, but I have to anyway.

I iz back init, update tomorrow or something.

Charan

Supposed to be the carnival today, but its raining so I'm guessing its cancelled. Spending today wrapping a few projects up and then gonna spend a day revising each of the topics for Fridays exam. That's my week gone.

Tonight's the last group meet. We're going for dinner at Zar Zars and Wednesday's the Rubix cube party, Friday's Pirate Bay, or something. Free bbq and its drink the bar dry. I feel tired just writing it all.

Still going through the after effects of meds, feeling a little better but still crappy. And I think I found an internship over summer. Gonna rock if it works out. £250 pw! VBG

You can see how you have been controlled in excess before now. You are seeking to be free of fear and hate, of oppression and suppression. You have a stronger urge for freedom of thought and action.


How the feck did my scope know that?

I had a hospital appointment today, the dermatologist wants to do another liver biopsy, is there any more left to take? They want to do patch tests, which I already had done at St Thomas' a few years ago and they re not changing my freaking meds! I hate her, I want Dr Swain back. She was nice and less dense. This of course means I can't leave the freaking country. I so just want to go see other places.

Feeling ind blah right now because I just had an exam. Cultural studies, bleh! I can see how it's useful but god it was boring! But then I'm a polychronic person wo likes to do lots of things at once, focusing on an exam is tres tedious.

I should now be preparing for my presentation tomorrow. I chose Animal Testing as my subject. God I have no attention span, skipping between this and Facebook. I'm bad... Flame was awesome, a night out usually is when you come home at dawn, but the floor was sticky and the only reason we left was because our hotness blew the electricity for the entire surrounding area. Gotta go, Love, Chaz

I have toothache. It sucks major donkey gonads.

It was my job to put up the posters for the LGBT Pink Party in the Business Building yesterday. I took a cab to the Halfway House after, to work on my assignment and left a few of them in the cab. Thing is the cabbie was muslim! Arggghhh!!!! Feeling really face/palm about that. Its tomorrow! Gotta wear pink tho... Blah.

Lotte's Paul is gay. He apparently had a tryst with someone who is out. What happened was that he said he wasn't ready for a relationship, then he goes off with a woman who breaks it off with the father of her child for him, then word is he's gay.... I think he wanted her to chase him, but she's grown up a bit after the Jonathan debacle. I think I'm actually proud of the little blondy. I haven't even covered his ex, Wayne or Kevin yet... She definitely dodged a bullet.

Monday - is the last E-Business seminar, Law lectures are over now.
Tuesday - Law Seminar that needs preparing for.
Wednesday - i have an exam for Communications Across Cultures.
Thursday - I have a presentation.
Friday - I have an essay due

29th is Law and 5th of June is E Business. AAAARGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! I haven't even had a chance to watch Hollyoaks since baby Charlie's custody battle.

Today I went too class and have been trying my contacts for a venue for the film night. Bloody Michael. He's from Manchester, he's gay, and for the University Challenge he wore a pink sweater and black cowboy hat. OMG it was all I could do not too laugh. Bless him. He's really getting involved in everything but he doesn't really have any imagination. We got cheesy music and pink for the party, but the subversive group that we are, we wanted black and metal/house.

So if you're wondering where I am then now you know! I also found facebook. Not addicted yet but it helps to keep in contact and with what's going on. Soooooo tired. Yawn.

I'm tired, bored and impatient.

Coursework hell week is over, I just have one piece due this Thurs and it's over with. Weirdly, considering my major, I enjoyed law and hated e-business. *Yawn* I skipped the seminar today because I can't be arsed. Thinking about Lancaster, waiing for them to get back to me. Realgap are retards and I'm seriously reconsidering the merits of going with them. I sent them an email. They have my address and then they call me to ask me to phone them back and give them the address!

What else?... Dad took his card back, the one which we put money in so that he doesn't overdraw. This time if he gives it back in arrears we're going our separate ways. The bank of Chaz is officially closed! And he's been promising Kirin the earth to get her onside. As with most things, he's all mouth and no trousers. She'll find out a lot of stuff like that the hard way. She doesn't listen and screams at you for offering her advice.

Chaz <-- Gotta get going, law lecture at 2.

Re: The general assumption that us Brits are dirtier minded than the americans. We grew up watching this...

*Cackles like a mad bitch*

I miss this...

I know, I know, I have a penchant for the overdramatic, but I'm working on it. Anyways, got in from Lotte's last night and was making myself a sandwich when a big, fuck off spider came down in front of me. Needless to say I screamed and ran. And about a minute ago, a huge bumble bee just buzzed straight on into my room. It was like 2cm wide, at least. Why do bugs like me so much? :-(

EDIT: There is now a wasp, flying repeatedly at the window, trying to get out

I've felt really, really lazy today. Managed to come down and socialize for a little while this morning when Tina & Sam came over, just about. Thank you caffein.

It was raining and grey and miserable so I stayed home, didn't go anywhere, in fact, I just surfed the net in bed all day. My arms seemed to have recovered, at least, I've been over doing the weight training. Pushed it to 25 on the Pec dec, and not having done it in a while, there were consequences. Owwie.

At least I found Turk Melrose's Myspace :-D the net's so random; the way you can be connected to everything and everyone. Snagged some nice pics, I feel a photoshop session coming on. And OMG! He's a Bi Scorpio, Get in! :-( Sad about the whole,'split with Winter,' thing. They were a true OTP.

Oh, and, anyone hear about Skins' entire cast being axed?!?! Like WTF!?!? ARGGHHHH!!! The bottom just fell outta the world. They're gonna replace the cast every two years, from now on, apparently.

This is it, the song that came to mind during the Toby stalking John Paul arc of last week!

Now who wants to make me a vid? *Smiles sweetly*

Maundy Thursday: Amar's athletics team won a first place trophy at an event celebrating the town's sporting achievements. Speeches and stuff were boring, but I was proud of the little blighter. *See icon*

Friday is a blur, as in I have no recollection of what happened at this precise moment in time. But chances are, not a lot. I have been a lazy sod so far this holiday. Got two weeks to do some work though.

Saturday was spent at my most fave place in the world: Haynes! God the weather was schizo! Snow, sun, rain, sleet, hail, all in the space of an hour! No jokes! This went on all day, but the company and the prettiness made up for it, the snow swirling around in the wind looked like something off of a Christmas card: figures in hats and scarves with fluffy white snow falling around them. It was so cool!

Harry came and joined us in the car after lunch and opened his easter egg. Mum collared the girls and sent me to drop of theirs at their car. My aunt is funny about presents, and that's okay, if it was for her. But it wasn't, I bought them for my cousins because Easter is like bigger than Christmas, significance wise. It can't pass without commemoration, even if it is with chocolate eggs. So I had a brief word pretty much to that effect, dumped the bag in the middle of the back seat, and ran away real fast! Oh my word that was funny, just the moment of eye contact with Sharon, and the knowledge that neither of us was going to back down, so I ran. Yay me! I win! *Does a dance*

Today was Easter, er by now I realize it's the early hours of Monday but work with me here, I had half a chocolate egg for breakfast with a cup of tea, and the other half and hour later. Then I got all headachey and came upstairs to chill in the peace and quiet. Had pakoras for lunch and then Kirin had a hissy fit/crying bout, because we dared to ask for the remote. She's always watching crapola on MTV or fucking Jerry Springer et al. What a load of bollocks.

And so I decided now would be a good time to sort out my DVD collection. So it's all on my bed and I'm categorizing when mum decides we are going to uncle's after all. Tina used to be a chef so we ate load and were stuffed up to our eyeballs. Gorgeous cake! Yum! They had Destiny overnight so she was on about that. It snowed again.

Dad engineered another sitch guaranteed to create a fight. So I had to calm mum own because she was close to tears. He'd piled all the laundry, we're talking the whole family's, towels and bedding, on their bed. Which kirin s sleeping in atm and, he's on the couch. He wante a fight, we didn't mention it and watched TV as if nothing ws wrong. So he tidied it all up trying to score points. Pathetic. Just ignored him again.

Watched that 'No 1 Ladies Detective Agency', made by the director that died recently, it was good. Did my email and pt away all my DVDs and stripped the bed. I am now wide awake at 1.47a.m.... Oh! And my muse came back last Thursday! *Is happy*

Just coz. 'It's therapeutic somehow.'

I have writer's block. So I'm making a post in somewhat feeble attempt to get it going again. I never thought it'd come to this but I miss my manic highs... It's quiet up there atm. Feels deadly wrong and weird to me because I'm not used to it. I should be able to construct a paragraph, then another and another until I've managed to create 'A' worthy brilliance in one half assed easy attempt. It's not happening. In fact, I feel nauseous at the computer, off it I'm okay.

I went to Milton Keynes today, took my lil' sis with me and it took 2 hours to get there. Had lunch in, reliable has place to sit as opposed to Pizza Hut, Debenhams and then went to H&M. Bought Kirin a couple of hoodies and one for Amar. Bought her school shoes, had smoothies, I got a shirt in mango with their logo on it; it's red and I like the sentiments. I got jeans in New Look and a top for mum. I always get her clothes but I can't think of anything else. Looked for shoes but didn't see anything decent. Came home had parattas and went upstairs to chill and catch up on Hollyoaks.

Oh, and I popped in on the new Apple store in Midsummer Place, busy as hell, but I got to talk to someone. We took silly pics on an imac.

I take my meds tonight...

I finally joined Facebook. I'd rather it was me than someone pretending to be me. And I also got round to opening my macbook last night. Only took a week... Felt naughty; Surfing on this one and watching hollyoaks on 4OD on the Dell.

Anyways, I thought I felt fine this morning; alert and really there, then we went to town and when I came back I was knockout for like an hour + another hour slipping in and out of consciousness. Got that weird pain in my throat and my chest feels achey. There was this stupid brat running around in Boots today and it sneezed on me. Fuck! Just cause you can procreate doesn't mean you should! Fucking useless mother was so not paying attention.

Was supposed to be going out tonight. But I started the day by loosing my debit card and forgetting my phone. So sketchy today but alert, really weird. They're going to a gay bar-the makeup party fell through-but it's windy, so nah.

I was surprised to see some LGBT club posters around campus considering the total lack of non sports clubs and the shite SU. I still think that the path to a better society does not include segregation. But I get the point of it, safety, easier to get laid...

This week I missed two classes because i was that tired. My councellor might be leaving soon. It's good to talk. Makes me consider stuff instead of just reacting my way through it.

I'm so procrastinating! Guh! This thing is addictive. Typing is so much easier on this thing. No idea why... Gotta go, going MK tomorrow. I want shoes and I have to find something for mothers day. I always buy her clothes...

My nipples taste like creme caramel yeah? *Snorts with laughter*

Followed by the classic: I'll be back.

Skins rocks! ###also kinda sad with the Sid having to deal with crap stuff.

i'm tired. Distracted. Juggling lot's of stuff and fitting it in around my need for sleep, meds, and some semblance of a social life. I now have like a plan for the next 3 years or so. I just need to fill in the details. Structure, commitment, organisation and self belief are things that I've lacked up til now. I'm like a totally different person.

The truth set me free... I just don't get why after all the wanting and waiting, now that I have a macbook I haven't bothered to open it yet? It arrived last thursday just as I was going out the door for class. Meh. I'm going to Nottingham hopefully. I made a decision. :-)

I found my phone! I cleared up and am back in my bed.

My cold is evil and sucks.

This Dell sucks and I'm returning it.

I ordered a Macbook because I want something that just fucking works!

I'm spending tomorrow and Fri at Haynes and I'll be home at the weekend. I have work to do. Like majorly got to pull a portfolio out of my arse but have writer's block. It's like I keep putting  it off.

I have to be up by 7 so  G'night.

I have a cold so I'll be brief. Erm... *Cough*

Season two of Skins started yesterday after long promos and vague coming soon ads. Last season Tony admitted he loved Michelle and then promptly got run over. Now he has PTSD and can't use his hands properly. He won't eat and trashed his room, and Michelle has been partying and fucking anything that moves. Sounding familiar? And then he turns up at the party and can't handle the crowds but is determined to see her again. Oh, and the icing on the cake is that he doesn't remember what happened.

Cassie's in Scotland and sends Sid a vid message and a present that kicks in at the party.

Sid emerges from his bedroom where he's been busy getting high all holidays, and has a trip at the party.

Maxxie is still cute as hell and has a stalker. This homophobe who's been bugging him jumps his bones at the party and comes out.

Chris looks like he's doing okay. Embracing the nu rave trend. Very summery.

Anwar is hilarious not least because my brother is doing the very same thing. He got this huge medallion yesterday.

And Jal was getting up close and personal with some guy at the party.